If someone you know has just lost a loved one, it can be difficult to know what to do.
You want to show your love and support, but on the other hand you don’t want to overwhelm them if they are also having a lot of other people reaching out.
A popular expression of condolences is sending sympathy flowers. But how do you know if you are close enough to the bereaved for that to be appropriate?
Read on for answers to all your sympathy flower questions.
What are Sympathy Flowers?
Sympathy flowers are floral arrangements sent as an expression of condolences to people who have recently lost a loved one.
Flowers are a popular choice because they are beautiful to look at, smell lovely, and hopefully offer a small moment of escape for the grieving recipient.
When is Sending Sympathy Flowers a Good Idea?
Sympathy flowers are a great idea if you are close to the recipient. They are a welcome gesture during dark times and they’ll know that you are just a phone call away if they need your support.
If you are a member of the family or a close friend, you’re in an even better position to send flowers because you’ll know the recipient and be able to send something tailored to them. This could be their favourite kind of flowers, or even their favourite colour.
Another time when sympathy flowers are nice is on behalf of a group. Rather than every work colleague or sporting teammate sending their own flowers, chip in and send a nice bouquet or wreath. These flowers will likely be a grander gesture than what everyone could manage individually.
When is Sending Sympathy Flowers Potentially a Bad Idea?
Despite being a beautiful gesture, sometimes sympathy flowers aren’t the best way to show your support.
We will clarify here, sympathy flowers are unlikely to upset or offend anyone, but you do always need to keep the purpose of the flowers in mind.
You’re sending them to show your support, but a lot of other people likely are as well, and they may be in a better position to show that support than you.
People often get inundated with sympathy flowers, and they are most appreciated if they come from someone close to them. Bear that in mind if you don’t know the person very well. As a guide, if you are a close friend or a family member send flowers, if you are a coworker or just an acquaintance, a simple message should be enough.
Flowers can also be an expensive gift, and the recipient may feel obliged to reach out and thank you, so make sure you take that into account if you aren’t all that close. You want to alleviate their stress, not contribute to it! In these cases, a simple message or card may be more appropriate while still showing you care.
Also bear in mind who the recipient is. Men are less likely to want to receive sympathy flowers. Also, if you know that the recipient or the deceased disliked flowers, you might want to send something else instead, like a gift basket or hamper.
Where Should You Send Sympathy Flowers?
Whether to send the flowers to the home or the funeral service is an important decision to make. While many people opt to send them to the recipient’s home, this isn’t always the best choice.
Firstly, sending flowers to the home means only the resident gets to enjoy them. If you’re close with the entire bereaved family, you’ll need to either send them all flowers, or you can send them to the funeral service instead where they can all appreciate them.
On the other hand, sending flowers directly to the home can be seen as more personal. The other advantage is you don’t have to wait for a funeral location to be confirmed. You can send your flowers as soon as you hear about the tragedy.
What Kind of Sympathy Flowers Should You Send?
Knowing what kind of sympathy flowers to send is difficult. You need to know the preferences of the deceased, the recipients and even their wider family.
This is especially true if you send the flowers to the funeral service, where they’ll ideally match the style of the funeral music and of the tone of the eulogy.
To help you choose, we’ve prepared an in depth guide to funeral flowers, including the meaning behind different species and colours.
Have You Considered a Funeral Director?
As with any decision regarding a funeral or the death of a loved one, making sure to choose the right funeral director can make a big difference to your stress levels throughout the grieving process.
At Coast Family Funerals, we can direct burial and cremation services and help you with all the necessary preparations.
So if you’re planning a funeral, or know someone who is who might appreciate some advice, please don’t hesitate to get in touch.